Looking back

I cannot believe it has almost been a year since my anxiety issues finally spun out of control and landed me in a horrible mess. It took me almost as long to recover fully; though I would say a major breakthrough came when I was switched back to the fluoxetine. Honestly, since I switched back in mid-September 2017 and my body got readjusted to it I have not had one panic attack since. It is AMAZING!!!! I feel like myself again, and have now for several months…and it brings a lump to my throat and tears to my eyes to recall the horror I went through and how I was so afraid but how, again, God brought me through. I doubted him. I thought for awhile that I was going to die. I was terrified, but even in the midst of my fear, He did not leave me. He did not forsake me. Not even for a moment.

I have realized something very profound through all of this. God’s presence here with us on this Earth is always with us. Though we might not feel it intensely and overwhelmingly all the time, even in our darkest moments, He is still there. Even if it’s just a glimmer, or a spark. It is enough, because even just a drop of God is enough for us. It is enough to sustain us and bring us through the darkest valley. The most terrifying nightmare. The most painful illness. He is always with us. He is the Word made flesh. His Word lights the way for us. His Word is mighty. It is a mighty, two edged sword. His Word will not return to Him as void. He will do all that He has promised us; He will accomplish all that He has set out to do. Jesus is the Word of God, so if we have His Word, we have Him. And His Spirit lives in us – and because His Holy Spirit resides within us, we are never alone. He IS always with us. He never leaves us alone, never forsakes us. We are His and NO ONE can pluck us from His mighty hand! Satan tries to deceive us any which way he can… but He will not be successful in the end. We ARE the righteousness of God, because Jesus lives IN us. He has MADE us worthy of His love and His redemption and when we realize the Power of God that resides in each of us, to do His will and to accomplish His great works in the Earth… God’s Kingdom will come, and His will will be done, on Earth, as it already is in Heaven!

We are His Beloved and He is ours. May we live lives worthy of His Name. Jesus, wash me with the water of your Word. Your love endures, forever! Thank you for all you have done in and through me this past year. Praise you for bringing me through such darkness into such marvelous Light! I love you, Lord. Forever I will sing your praise!

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About Shannon

My life is summed up in two words: Saving Grace. God saw fit to bless me with a little girl who, for all intents and purposes, turned out to be my saving grace. She is the best part of my life, and the best part of me. I am a single working mother (I know, that phrase is redundant :) so I don't have a lot of time for extracurricular activities, but I like to write, and so I thought I'd start another blog (I've had many in the past) so that I could have an outlet for myself, during my down time ...whenever that can be snatched. It's few and far between these days.... but we'll see where this takes me.
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2 Responses to Looking back

  1. Gisela S Stewart says:

    My dear Shannon,
    I am so happy you feel you have fully recovered from the nightmare of a year ago. I know how our Lord can be of great help in our distress at times. When I lost Opa I felt very distressed & lost, but little by little, with prayer, I accepted my loss. Our loving family is also a great help. I pray for you all the time & little Emma too. You are such a talented writer & I’m sure it helps you to come to terms with whatever problems you face & also your prayers will help. Our God is a loving God & is always there for us.
    I love you my dear granddaughter.
    Omi

    • Shannon says:

      Thank you Omi! 🙂 I appreciate your prayers and thoughts more than you know. Friends and family have been a wonderful help through this whole ordeal and I know that God has used many people in my life to bless me in this way. Love you so much!

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